


twenty twelve

by DBZLover4Ever



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Team Dynamics
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-16
Updated: 2019-07-16
Packaged: 2020-06-29 06:51:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19824784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DBZLover4Ever/pseuds/DBZLover4Ever
Summary: “Bucky.is.alive," Steve said, looking directly into Tony’s eyes. "That’s what Loki told me. Those were his exact words. I had him in a sleeper hold, and he knew exactly what to say to get me to release him. And sure, I know it’s absolutely crazy to dwell on that statement as anything more than a cheap trick to escape, but it’s like there’s a projector in my head playing Bucky’s fall over and over again, and I keep saying to myself, ‘what if Loki’s right?'”“It's 2012, Steve, there’s no way he would be alive even if he did survive the fall,” Natasha said, tone slightly more gentle than Tony’s had been, but Steve still heard the edge in her voice.“They never found his body. Not in seventy years, they never found it.” Steve could tell he was sounding more and more desperate by the second.





	twenty twelve

Steve woke up panting, sweat dripping off his brow. 

He hadn’t had _that_ nightmare in a long time. To be technical it had been over seventy years, but thinking about exactly how long it had been brought all the other bad dreams back. The ones where he was the one who fell into the unforgiving ice and snow, unaware of what lay ahead waiting for him.

_This_ nightmare was almost as familiar, but it hadn’t been of the day Steve said good-bye to the past. This nightmare was the day he said good-bye to the only thing he recognized as “home” in the war. Peggy might have been his future, but Bucky was everything about his past.

The second Steve had woken up in the middle of Stark Tower, clearly defeated by his facsimile yet with the scepter curiously untouched where it had fallen from his grasp, he was already forming plans in his head. After extricating himself from Fury and Alexander Pierce’s tag-team chewing out of the newly-assembled Avengers, he had tried putting in every variation of “James Buchanan Barnes” he could think of into an internet search box. Every result echoed what he had thought was true until earlier that day: Bucky Barnes died in 1945 after a fatal fall from a speeding train in the Alps.

Steve dragged himself out of bed, figuring sleep would be elusive for the rest of the night. He needed to think anyways. His life had really taken a turn for the bizarre over the last couple of weeks.

When Thor had told Odin of Loki’s escape with the Tesseract, the Asgardian prince had been ordered not to return until his brother and the Tesseract were in his custody. Now Steve was living in the same building as the _god of Thunder_ after Tony had offered them space in the undamaged parts of Stark Tower while they tracked down Thor’s wayward brother. They were both joined by Dr. Banner who was another recipient of Tony Stark’s generosity after the Chitauri were defeated. He spent the majority of his time in the newly redone lab Tony had placed at the top of the priority list for post alien-invasion fixes

Steve had selfishly volunteered to be S.H.I.E.L.D’s eyes and ears for this mission and even went so far as to request Agents Hawkeye and Romanov be on the Loki-recovery team along with him. He was surprised that no one had objected or even added conditions to his request. Even Agent Sitwell who, rumor had it, famously would insert himself into any mission that seemed like it was lacking in experience (read: “individuals who appreciated S.H.I.E.L.D. bureaucracy,” neither Barton nor Romanov counted), was silent. Steve had been out of the ice for less than a couple months and really only had one S.H.I.E.L.D. mission under his belt; he was more green than most of the trainees. 

He wasn’t even sure he _wanted_ to be part of S.H.I.E.L.D. Finding those weapons on the Helicarrier and the revelations that were the failed Manhattan nuclear strike had definitely soured his feelings on the organization. However, being the S.H.I.E.L.D liaison for this mission meant he might be able to avoid part two of what could happen should they get their hands on the Tesseract again. 

He made his way to the Avengers communal area and found Thor sitting on one of Tony’s most comfortable couches, eating popcorn out of a huge bowl. When Thor met his eyes, the Asgardian beckoned to the seat next to him.

“Ah Steven!” Thor greeted warmly. “Please join me in my consumption of these popped-corn snacks.”

“Hey Thor, you couldn’t sleep either?” Steve asked, while taking the offered seat.

“I believe Asgardians do not require as much sleep as humans, but in truth I had a dream that I did not wish to relive.”

"You and me both. Though I am a little surprised that Asgardian aliens can also get nightmares. At times you seem way larger than life, and nightmares seem very…earthbound.” 

“I may have had an occasional nightmare in my youth, but they have been much more frequent of late.” Thor said, his voice tinged with something Steve couldn’t quite place. “I can tell you that they are not a purely Midgardian affliction.”

Steve responded after a beat. “Well, I guess there’s another good reason humans aren’t as alone in the universe as I was taught a lifetime ago. It is kind of comforting to know that there are others out there who get the human experience, even the bad parts.”

“There is a certain strength that comes through empathy and the sharing of one’s experience. When we were younger, Loki had far more nightmares than I. He would often tell me of their content, but as the eldest and heir-apparent to Asgard’s throne, I felt I could not share mine in return.” Thor spread his fingers wide and looked at his palms as if there was a great truth written in the lines. “Eventually Loki stopped sharing them with me after he realized for himself how much of a role his fear played in his nightmare’s content.” Thor curled his hands back into fists and rested them on his legs.

Steve didn’t quite know what to say, so he thought about his own experiences with bad dreams growing up. “When Bucky and I were kids, we might have talked about dreams with one another, but by the time the war hit nightmares were just part of the territory. Sharing them would have seemed more of a cry for attention than anything else, so people tended to keep them close to the chest.”

“It seems in that regard, we are not so different either.”

Thor offered Steve some popcorn and the two sat in a comfortable silence but for the occasional snacking for a while. Steve tried to think about the Loki investigation and the busy day he had ahed of him, but his thoughts kept circling back to his dream. Now seemed as good a time as ever to bite the bullet and finally ask the question that had been on his mind ever since he woke up in a world where Bucky Barnes _might_ be alive. 

“I wanted to ask you something, Thor, about Loki.” Thor stilled, hand halfway to his mouth, when Steve said Loki’s name. He finished off the popcorn he grabbed and gestured for Steve to continue asking.

Taking a deep breath, Steve asked, “Thor, has your brother ever- I mean before Stuttgart- and I read about the Destroyer but wasn’t sure about his level of involvement. Apart from that does he- did he- spend time on Earth? Maybe in the last century?” Steve held his breath as he waited for Thor to answer. He knew the pure unabashed hope in his heart was written clearly on his face, but didn’t bother to hide it. 

Thor looked away in thought. “Before his first appearance at S.H.I.E.L.D.? Loki did came to Earth to visit me after my exile, just before he sent the Destroyer. However, before that time, I cannot speak to. There is only one person on Asgard who can travel freely between realms without the All-father or Heimdall knowing, and I am afraid it is Loki.”

“So potentially, he might have visited- say 70 years ago, and found something or I don’t know, someone, that was lost?”

“Perhaps, but I cannot say for sure. What is this about, Steven?”

Steve looked down, thinking of a way to explain the impossible. “I think your brother knows something about-”

“Morning, Cap, Thor.” Dr. Banner said absently as he entered the room, interrupting Steve mid-sentence.

Steve glanced at a clock and almost did a double-take when he realized how quickly he would need to move to make his morning meeting with Director Fury. “Morning Bruce,” he replied, pushing himself to his feet. Referring to his couch companion, Steve said, “I’ll talk to you about this later Thor, but I have to head out now to get ready for a meeting with Fury.” 

“There will be time for future discussion when you return. I was grateful for your companionship, Steven.”

“Same here, Thor. Thanks for sharing the popcorn.” On Steve’s way out of the room, he paused. “Thor, if you ever want someone to talk to about nightmares from last night or any other dreams you have, I’ll happily join you. I may not be Loki, but I’ve been told I’m a good listener—”

“A fall, Steven. I dreamt of a fall I could not stop.”

___

The Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. had been acting strangely for a while now. Granted their treatment of Captain America had been awkward since day one but their treatment of Steve Rogers had really gone off the rails since the Battle of New York. 

So many different S.H.I.E.L.D. individuals had tried to wink at him over the past couple weeks that he couldn’t be sure whether the wink itself had completely changed meanings while he was on ice. That day, he had tried and failed winking for himself, using the gesture to indicate thanks to an older woman who had just finished cleaning the bathrooms. The fact that her cheeks turned red and she fled without responding made him think that he had misinterpreted the meaning by some margin. 

“So I heard you hit on a 65 year-old today,” Tony Stark said as he sauntered into the conference room Steve had booked for his meeting with Fury. He was carrying one of those awful looking green juice drinks that seemed to be his only source of sustenance. The billionaire playboy came into the S.H.I.E.L.D. office fairly infrequently but had been in New York overseeing renovations on the Tower. Fury called him in for this week’s edition of Steve/S.H.I.E.L.D.’s Tesseract investigation debrief. Steve was the first person in the room, hoping to have a moment to organize his thoughts in peace before the meeting began. So much for that.

“We don’t have to talk about this. Obviously, I was wrong and will now consult the internet whenever I have a question about what a gesture might mean.”

“Oh no, Cap, you misunderstand. I just wanted to congratulate you on finally acting your age! And why consult the internet, when you can just ask me the best ways to hit on older women? Or in this case is it younger?”

Steve rolled his eyes. He still hadn’t quite managed to get a handle on Tony. “Har har. Very funny. Do you have any other jokes to get out of your system before this debrief?”

Tony put on a show of consideration. “No, I’m good. Might try some more tomorrow. When’s the first date?” When Steve looked at him sharply, Tony raised his arms in mock surrender. “That was the last one I swear.” He reached inside his jacket for his phone and started tapping at buttons at a dizzying pace. 

When Steve was satisfied that Tony would remain silent for more than five seconds, he opened the folder he brought into the room to review his debrief notes. 

“Um Steve…why is there a picture of Bucky Barnes in your folder on the Tesseract’s whereabouts?” 

“Wha-?”

Steve followed Tony’s gaze downwards, landing on a black and white image of his fellow Howling Commando. Tony casually moved a hand in the direction of the image, and Steve jerked so abruptly that Tony immediately halted the movement. When Tony looked at him, Steve coughed quietly to attempt to cover his involuntary reaction.

_I put this in the wrong damn folder_ , Steve thought, looking back down at the picture. He forced himself not to snatch the photo up and hide it from sight, like was his first thought, and slowly closed the folder again. “I,” he started, “have a theory.”

“Care to enlighten the rest of the class?” Clint Barton asked, leaning on the door frame. Natasha Romanov was directly behind him, and Steve was starting to feel more like a child who wasn’t prepared for a class presentation rather than the man leading an investigation for an Intelligence agency. 

“It’s not quite fully-fledged yet, and I was definitely not going to announce it during this meeting-”

Natasha interrupted him, “Well what is it Steve, we’ve been chasing dead-end leads ever since Loki up and took the Tesseract from us. We have no idea where he went or even what galaxy he might be in, so even war stories from seventy years ago might be better than nothing.”

Steve didn’t respond. He didn’t know much about the 21st century, but he was very aware that privacy in the future was more of a commodity than it had been in his heyday. He knew that the S.H.I.E.L.D. agents were likely reporting to Fury as well as him, and knew nothing of Tony’s own allegiances other than to himself. 

Tony piped up. “Well whatever this theory is, I’m guessing you don’t want to tell Fury or anyone else in S.H.I.E.L.D.? That’s why you’re playing so coy.” Everyone looked at the billionaire in shock.

“Why would you just say-”

“I counted ten cameras in this-”

“Stark, even you are not that stu-”

Before they could finish, Tony took a long slurp of the last dregs of his juice. When the responses quieted, he went on, “I requested to Fury that all recording devices be offline in every conference room I enter whenever I come to a S.H.I.E.L.D. office.”

Steve replied, skeptical, “And you believe that Fury, _Nick Fury_ , listened to your request.”

“Not at all, Cap. The second he agreed, I took that as permission to disable all of the cameras and bugs myself. No one’s complained yet, but that might be because I loop a different video every time instead of just shutting them off.” Tony leaned back in his seat, clearly satisfied with himself.  
“By the way, Steve,” he continued. “If people start bothering you for your mother’s apple pie recipe, tell them you’re planning on taking it to your grave -again. Thank you.” Tony completed a mock bow. 

Steve looked at the S.H.I.E.L.D. agents, cautious of their reactions. Clint found a seat and leaned back, crossing his arms while Natasha shrugged nonchalantly. Both of them had seemed more open to working with him than he might have expected, but it all could be an act. Steve liked to think he could read people, though, and hoped this trust he placed in them wouldn’t be for naught.

Sensing the assessment of the two agents was over, Tony added, “Also, very close, Barton, there were twelve cameras in this room. I think Fury installed two more in a recent fit of paranoia.”

“Well, that solves that, but are you sure you don’t want to wait and tell Thor too? At Stark tower?” Natasha asked as she eased into a chair beside Clint. 

Stark interjected, “I told you, we’re calling it ‘Avengers Tower’ now.”

Thor had _misliked_ spending time at S.H.I.E.L.D. ever since the first day he arrived for one of Steve’s debriefing meetings and found several Junior agents doing their weapons training, on targets with Loki’s face on them. 

The feelings were probably mutual after Thor, in his own act of “weapons training” took S.H.I.E.L.D. offline for two full days. By the time the lights in the building had come back on, all of the Loki-targets had been replaced by candids of Nick Fury mid-sentence. (Tony claims he wasn’t involved but Steve never would have guessed his hand in Cecilia from accounting’s questions about optimal pie-baking temperatures. And this was much more his MO.) Steve pledged to stay out of the rapidly deteriorating Asgardian-SHIELD-relations, reminding Fury each time he breached the topic that Steve’s role essentially rendered it unnecessary for Thor to come to S.H.I.E.L.D. offices at all.

Steve opened the folder again, taking another look at the picture of Bucky. It was one where Buck was in uniform, the day he shipped off to Europe, looking dapper as usual. Steve took a deep breath. “I talked to Thor last night and only came up with this theory afterward. I’ll share it with him later.” He checked the clock on the wall and sighed. “Fine, we’ve got, what fifteen minutes before the meeting starts and Fury and Hill always arrive fashionably late. I don’t think Pierce is coming, which is good because he’s the only one who is actually punctual.”

“Has anyone else noticed how much of a shine Pierce has taken to Cap these days?” Tony asked. “I swear I caught him smiling last week when you made a joke about the war.”

Ever since the Tesseract had slipped from Alexander Pierce’s hands, he had taken an active in role in its recovery. People whispered that it had been the longest amount of time that Pierce had been seen below floor 40 of any S.H.I.E.L.D.-operated building. 

Pierce had also taken a very active interest in Steve, waiting after these debriefing meetings to chat amicably about his adjustment to the future. 

They were both ex-military, ex-Army even, and though they had been to separate wars there were certain experiences soldiers shared. Steve still didn’t quite trust him, not even as much as he might have trusted Fury. There was something to be said about men smiling to your face and lying behind your back. At least Fury had the courtesy not to do the former while clearly participating in the latter. 

Steve started, “Well, like I said, it’s not quite a full theory more like another way of looking at the problem. So, we’re looking for Loki, right? I know our first thought was that he could be anywhere in the galaxy or even the universe. The Tesseract opens doors into space, which sounds like the perfect device for a quick get-a-way, but for someone like Loki, it’s one of the worst things he could have.” 

Sensing the rest of the Avengers’ stares, he continued, “It’s because he can already do that under his own power. Sure the Tesseract was great for his initial escape, but talking to Thor, Loki already knows how to travel undetected between worlds.”

Natasha countered, “So why wouldn’t he just go and bring the Tesseract to whoever it was that sent him here? It seems like that was what he was after.”

“Because he lost,” Tony replied. “Sure he got the Tesseract, but his army was destroyed and now we know there’s someone behind the curtain who is probably not very happy with him. He didn’t even manage to take that scepter with him.”

“Exactly,” Steve agreed. “And I’m willing to bet if you’re on the bad side of both Asgard and this unknown new player, there aren’t a lot of places to hide.”

“Can’t say he’s on S.H.I.E.L.D.’s good side either,” Tony added.

“Exactly, and if I were on the bad side of three separate factions, I might take my chances with the one that I have already proven I can escape from…twice. I might even do something so crazy as to fake my escape to the furthest reaches of space and make a half-hearted attempt to steal back the scepter on my way out.”

“So you’re saying that you think Loki, the Loki whose ass we just handed to him, is hiding somewhere on Earth under our noses,” Natasha said. Steve grimaced and glanced at Clint who was silent and completely unreadable.

“It’s just an idea, a guess even. But Thor has made zero progress going back and forth between here and Asgard to use their resources to track Loki. And…” he took a deep breath.

“There’s the matter of Sergeant Barnes,” Clint filled in for him.

“Right,” Steve breathed knowing this was the part where he was going to lose his audience for good. “Tony, are you sure there’s no video footage from when Loki escaped?”

“Sorry, Cap, like I told you most of the cameras in the building were shorted by the initial energy pulse from the Tesseract, and the rest of them, depending on your level of cynicism are somewhere between suspiciously tampered with or reasonably unhelpful. Guess which side Fury’s on!”

Natasha rapped the desk impatiently. “Alright Steve, you’ve been been talking around the subject for a while. Barnes. Spill.” 

It was now or never, Steve supposed. “Well I may have not been completely forthcoming when I gave S.H.I.E.L.D. my report on my confrontation with Loki-disguised-as-me.”

The mischievous look of glee that broke out on Tony’s face was enough to get Steve to continue quickly enough to avoid the man’s next quip. Natasha beat him to it.

“Steve, I think we’re all pretty suspicious of that story. You told Fury that Loki knocked you out after you let your guard down, and when you came to, the scepter was still sitting there. You didn’t even mention to anyone besides us that Loki was wearing your face.”

Tony had more. “You were also extremely jumpy during the entire recovery of the Tesseract, you wouldn’t have just _let_ down your guard. Actually you seem pretty on edge now; it’s hard to imagine you taking a break in the middle of a fight.”

“Loki’s a tough fighter but his real strength is in his words, what did he say to you?” Natasha asked.

“It’s got to be something that you wouldn’t have expected. Something that made you drop everything and forget the problem at hand, a weakness of sorts. So it’s true! Even Cap isn’t perfect!”

Before Steve could add a retort to Tony, Clint spoke up for the second time since they started mentioning Loki. “Judging from your reaction to Tony’s _moving his arm_ in the direction of that picture, I think we all know what yours might be,” Clint added.

Steve almost let his jaw drop open at being read so easily, but he was in a room with the two best spies S.H.I.E.L.D. had to offer and one of the world’s brightest minds. It wasn’t a coincidence that they might be a step or two ahead of him.

“Bucky’s alive,” he said, mostly to himself. 

“You’re going to have to say that a little louder, so I can make sure you don’t need your head checked,” Tony replied.

“ _Bucky_. _is_. _alive_. That’s what Loki told me. Those were his exact words. I had him in a sleeper hold, and he knew exactly what to say to get me to release him. And sure, I know it’s absolutely crazy to dwell on that statement as anything more than a cheap trick to escape, but it’s like there’s a projector in my head playing Bucky’s fall over and over again, and I keep saying to myself, ‘what if Loki’s right?'”

“It’s 2012, Steve, there’s no way he would be alive even if he did survive the fall,” Natasha said, tone slightly more gentle than Tony’s had been, but Steve still heard the edge in her voice. 

“They never found his body. Not in seventy years, they never found it.” Steve could tell he was sounding more and more desperate by the second. “I know it’s a long shot, really just way out of left field, but we haven’t found anything on Loki yet and the last thing he said to any of us is that Bucky is alive. It must mean something, it just _has_ to—”

“I didn’t tell Loki anything about Sergeant Barnes,” Clint said quietly but his voice immediately quieted Steve. “I gave him dirt on the whole team, but I never mentioned Barnes. I wouldn’t have even considered it, since up until now I figured he was long in the ground.”

“Well, Steve,” Tony said, standing up from the table. “This does put your recent internet search history into much better context.”

Steve paled. “Wait what?” Tony raised an arm to stop him before Steve could really consider how bad it would be if S.H.I.E.L.D. knew he was chasing ghosts.

“It’s fine, it’s fine. I wiped it as soon as I saw it. Welcome to the 21st century. Lesson one: If you don’t want people to know what you’re doing on the internet, don’t sign into the S.H.I.E.L.D. Wi-Fi.” Tony paused dramatically. “As for your theory, not the most batshit crazy thing I’ve heard. Even this week. I’m not fully convinced that your friend is alive, because that’s impossible, but it would be interesting to know how Loki knew about your weakness being Barnes.”

Steve turned back at the two S.H.I.E.L.D. agents whose heads were bowed, clearly speaking softly to one another. 

He took a deep breath, he had one more card left in his hand. The one where speaking it aloud for the first time would somehow make it more true. The one he didn’t want to admit might have been partially his fault when he found his best friend strapped to a table in a factory run by a scientist whose only motto was ‘the ends justify the means’ when it came to human experimentation and replicating the Super Soldier serum. “There’s one more thing.”

Tony’s eyebrows shot up. “Oh, there’s more?” Natasha and Clint stopped talking. 

“There’s a way Bucky could have survived the fall, and even made it to the future. I think he was experim—”

“So the team’s all here!” Steve’s voice died in his throat. Alexander Pierce strode into the room, seemingly oblivious to the previous conversation. Steve could tell Pierce’s eyes were roaming around the room, looking for something that might have been off. 

The soldier was impressed how quickly the masks slid onto the two S.H.I.E.L.D agents’ faces and even when he glanced at Tony, the man had already plastered his famously unimpressed expression, complete with sunglasses. 

“Did I miss any important revelations?” Pierce asked when he had finally got around to meeting Steve’s gaze.

Steve cleared his throat. “Pierce! You’re just in time-“

“Steve here wanted to start without you and Fury-” Tony added before Steve could say anything to tip Pierce off. He was clearly the worst at the game of trying to be casual

“But we didn’t let him,” Natasha finished.

“Good,” the secretary replied. “Glad to hear it.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! This thing basically wrote itself, but I'm still outlining so I'm still not exactly sure where this story is going to go. First story on this site after a long fic-writing hiatus. Looking forward to hearing feedback and continuing with the story!


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